The Ongoing Adventures of Naked Girl

The story of my quest to look good naked -- really good.

Tuesday, February 10, 2004

I didn't make it to the gym yesterday, despite my good intentions. All hell broke loose at the office -- people calling in sick, call volume up about 25% over a normal Monday. The only thing that could have capped it off was if the phones or computers went down.

My gym plans were foiled because I ended up staying until 5:15 PM, and I needed to be home by 5:30 since the dogs were outside. I also ended up getting off of my food schedule a little, but I did eat all of my meals and I did it on plan. The only little slip was a few handful of crackers around 2 PM. I really wanted to binge. I really thought I "deserved" something special for all the hard work I was doing -- ice cream, Mexican food, chips. Ahhh, but I didn't. I was tempted to even order Mexican food last night, but I grilled up some tasty sausages (chicken with habanero chilies) and tossed together a small salad. My real reward for being on plan -- down 2 pounds this morning. This made me happy, of course, but I still don't seem satisfied. Why can't I just be happy about this?

Today is looking ugly, but not nearly as ugly as yesterday. Some of the incidents over the last few months and especially the last few weeks, are making me seriously consider my career path. I just don't like managing people. I don't like the fact that my review is partially based on my direct reports' performance and if they like me. I'm having a hard time with a few of the employees "talking behind my back" and I hate feeling like I'm in high school. I get a long well with my peers and management and most of the staff, but there is one or two I would love to foist on to another leader. I'm keeping my fingers crossed on the job interview next week. I just hope it's something that is really interesting and stable.

I'm on plan so far with my breakfast. I am still fighting the urge to binge. I'd love to be able to go into my nutritionist appointment tomorrow down 2 pounds. Why is this such a struggle??


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